Last Updated on January 17, 2026 by Lila Sjöberg
There’s crying, and then there’s colic. If you’re here, you probably know the difference — the inconsolable screaming that starts like clockwork each evening, lasts for hours, and nothing you do seems to help. I remember feeling like a complete failure every single night, wondering what I was doing wrong.
Key Takeaways
Colic is defined as crying for three or more hours a day, three or more days a week, for three or more weeks — in an otherwise healthy baby. It typically peaks around six weeks and resolves by three to four months. Colic isn’t caused by bad parenting, and while there’s no cure, there are ways to cope and soothing strategies that sometimes help.
The Short Answer: Colic is excessive crying in otherwise healthy babies, usually peaking in the evening. It’s not your fault, and it does end — typically by four months. Until then, try different soothing techniques, take breaks when you need them, and accept all the help you can get.
If you’re in the thick of it, here’s what might help you survive until it passes.
What Colic Actually Is (And Isn’t)
Colic isn’t a disease or a diagnosis of something wrong — it’s a description of a pattern. The classic definition is the “rule of threes”: crying at least three hours a day, at least three days a week, for at least three weeks, in a baby under three months old.
The crying typically happens at the same time each day, often in the late afternoon or evening. Baby seems healthy otherwise — eating well, gaining weight, developing normally. But during those crying episodes, nothing comforts them and they seem to be in distress.
Doctors don’t fully understand what causes colic. Theories include immature digestive systems, gut bacteria imbalances, overstimulation, or simply a developmental phase some babies go through. What we do know is that it’s not caused by something parents did or didn’t do.
Soothing Strategies That Sometimes Help
No single technique works for all colicky babies, but many parents find relief with the “five S’s”: swaddling, side or stomach position (while held, not for sleep), shushing, swinging, and sucking. Combining several of these sometimes breaks through when one alone doesn’t.
Swaddling provides that snug, womb-like feeling. Some colicky babies calm significantly when wrapped firmly. Use a proper swaddle technique or a swaddle wrap — loose blankets aren’t safe for sleep.
White noise or shushing sounds mimic the constant whooshing baby heard in the womb. This can be surprisingly loud — the womb wasn’t quiet. A white noise machine, vacuum cleaner, or even a loud “shhhh” right next to baby’s ear sometimes helps.
Teacher Carol has a very nice video on YouTube named “528 Hz | Love Frequency | Bedtime Sleep Music for Babies” , obviously just to use the audio, you can find it here.
Motion soothes many fussy babies. Rhythmic bouncing, walking, swaying, or using a swing or vibrating chair can interrupt the crying cycle. Car rides work for some babies — the vibration and motion together seem to help.
Sucking is calming, whether on a breast, bottle, finger, or pacifier. If baby isn’t hungry but needs to suck, a pacifier can provide that comfort without overfeeding.
Could It Be Something Else?
Before assuming colic, rule out other causes of crying with your pediatrician. Sometimes what looks like colic is actually reflux — where stomach acid irritates the esophagus. Signs of reflux include arching during feeds, spitting up frequently, and seeming worse when lying flat.
Food sensitivities can cause fussiness too. If you’re breastfeeding, dairy in your diet is a common culprit. Formula-fed babies might need a different formula type. Your pediatrician can guide you through elimination trials if sensitivity seems possible.
Always check for simple discomforts: a hair wrapped around a finger or toe (called a hair tourniquet), a scratchy clothing tag, diaper rash, or being too hot or cold. Sometimes the “colic” resolves when you find and fix a specific discomfort.
If baby’s crying is accompanied by fever, vomiting, bloody stool, or poor feeding, call your pediatrician — these aren’t colic symptoms and need evaluation. Our guide to when to call the doctor covers all the red flags.
Taking Care of Yourself
Colic is hard on babies, but it’s brutal on parents. The relentless crying triggers stress responses in your brain — you’re literally wired to find that sound intolerable. Feeling frustrated, desperate, or even resentful is completely normal.
It’s okay to put baby down in a safe place and walk away for a few minutes. A crying baby in a crib is safe; a baby being held by a parent who’s lost control is not. If you feel yourself reaching a breaking point, set baby down, leave the room, and take some deep breaths.
Ask for help, and be specific. “I need someone to hold the baby from 5 to 7 PM so I can decompress” is better than a vague “I’m struggling.” Partners should tag-team so neither person absorbs hours of crying alone every day.
Our self-care for moms guide offers more ideas for maintaining your sanity during difficult phases, whenever it’s possible of course, sometimes you just want it to stop, ask for help.
What Doesn’t Help
Despite what desperate parents try, there’s limited evidence that most “colic remedies” actually work. Gripe water, gas drops, colic calm — some parents swear by them, but studies haven’t proven consistent effectiveness. They’re unlikely to hurt if used as directed, but don’t expect miracles.
Constantly switching formulas without pediatrician guidance often makes things worse, not better. Babies need time to adjust to any formula, and frequent changes can upset their digestion further.
Driving yourself crazy trying every suggestion you read online exhausts you without necessarily helping baby. Pick a few strategies, give them a real try, and accept that sometimes nothing works — and that’s not your failure.
The Light at the End
Colic peaks around six weeks and typically resolves by three to four months. That timeline feels impossibly long when you’re in it, but it does end. Almost every parent who’s survived colic says the same thing: one day, they realized the crying had stopped.
There are no lasting effects on babies who had colic. They don’t remember it, and it doesn’t affect their development or personality long-term. Your colicky baby will likely become a happy, thriving child with no memory of those screaming evenings.
Mark a calendar. Count the weeks. Know that you’re getting closer to the end even when it doesn’t feel like it. This phase is temporary, even though it feels eternal right now.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is colic my fault?
Absolutely not. Colic happens to babies regardless of parenting approach, feeding method, or anything else parents control. It’s not caused by something you did or didn’t do. Good parents have colicky babies; it’s just how some babies are wired in early infancy.
Should I try eliminating foods from my diet while breastfeeding?
Some babies do respond to maternal dietary changes, particularly eliminating dairy. But this isn’t proven to help all colicky babies and can be hard to maintain. Talk to your pediatrician before starting an elimination diet, and give any change at least two weeks before judging effectiveness.
Will colic affect my bond with my baby?
The stress of colic can temporarily make bonding harder, and that’s okay to acknowledge. It doesn’t mean you love your baby less or that your relationship is damaged. Many parents find that once colic resolves, bonding strengthens quickly. If you’re concerned about your feelings toward your baby, talk to your healthcare provider.
How do I handle people who say I’m spoiling my baby by holding them?
You cannot spoil a newborn. Babies need comfort and contact, especially when they’re distressed. Holding, rocking, and soothing your crying baby is exactly what you should do. Smile, nod, and ignore outdated advice from people who don’t have to live through your evenings.
When should I call the doctor?
Call if crying is accompanied by fever, vomiting, diarrhea, blood in stool, or poor weight gain. Also call if the crying seems different than usual — higher-pitched, weaker, or more urgent — or if your gut says something is wrong. Trust your instincts.
You’re in one of the hardest phases of early parenting. It tests your patience, your relationship, and your sanity. But you will get through it, and your baby will be fine, and eventually this will be a difficult memory rather than your daily reality.
Hang in there. You’re doing better than you know. 😅
Lila.
